The Fear of Change

LISTEN TO PODCAST EPISODE HERE-> https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/BC9KZ2KMvwb

In today’s episode of the Inspiration2Grow podcast I want to challenge your fears, in particular your fear of implementing change in your life. 

Are you adverse to change?  Do you like things to stay the same, be predictable without any surprises?  Does risk scare the heck out of you?  Do you come up with all kinds of excuses why you can’t make a change in your life?

By the end of today’s episode, I hope to inspire you to adopt a new attitude towards change.

Change makes us versatile.  Change allows us to move forward in life and experience both new and exciting things.  Learning new skills or working on your inner self can bring about changes you never knew were possible.

If you don’t actively work on evolving yourself, life becomes stagnant.
  
So, let me ask you this question…

What do you think of when I ask you to imagine change?  What comes to mind?

Most of us think of the small changes in our everyday life, such as New Year’s resolutions, those little promises we often make to ourselves that help make our lives just a little bit better.  Get healthier, fitter, smarter, practice more self-care, spend more time with loved ones, read more, get more fresh air.  Some people imagine travelling more, cooking at home more and trying new recipes, working out more.

But, then we take a look at the other end of the spectrum of change…the huge changes that have impacted the world.

Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, Mark Zuckerberg, Marie Curie, Leonardo Da Vinci, Mahatma Ghandi, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, to name a few. These great names (and many more) have made changes which influenced all of our lives as we know it in some way.

So, if you could see me now, image my arms stretched out to each side or imagine my wingspan.  On one end you have the small changes and at the other end you have the huge, massive changes people such as the ones I just mentioned have made.

The Range of Change =>=>

                II———————————————-THE MIDDLE——————————————————-II
                                                                            

But what about the area in the middle of this spectrum?  This is where few of us dare to go.  This is where the scariest changes happen and the ones that affect our lives the most.  No matter how many small promises you make to yourself or no matter how many people join Mark Zuckerberg’s Meta-verse…it is these middle changes that have the most impact on our lives.

I’m referring to changes that affect you for the rest of your life; changes that set you on a completely different path; changes that are nearly impossible to un-do.
These mid-range changes are often dismissed by the following statements:

-> Oh, I could never do it.  It’s too risky.
-> I just don’t have the time for it.
-> Yeah, maybe another day.
-> Oh, I’m comfortable where I am.
-> I don’t need to do this.

Here’s the raw truth -> change is NEVER going to happen with this attitude.  Change means moving from point A to point B, but it’s the transition that really scares people.

What if we didn’t fear change at all?  What if we decided to go against the norm, get out of our comfort zone, and leave the safety net behind us?  IMAGINE CHANGE

Our lives are pre-determined for us in a way.  We are expected to attend school, then go on to college or university, only to secure a job, buy a house and start a family.  The hope most parents have for their children, at least that was the case for me.

I would like to tell you about my personal story, one not many people actually know in detail.
 
I like to think I was your average teenager.  At school, I excelled in some subjects and had to work harder in others.  In my spare time, I held down a part-time job to earn and save for post secondary education, however I enjoyed spending my hard-earned money on clothes and jewellery – much to my mother’s dismay. 

During the final two years of high school, it was time to get serious about career choices and university applications.  This meant doubling down on school to achieve the necessary marks for the programs I wanted to apply for.  The only two things that were clear for me was that I loved teaching and helping other people and I loved sports.  During this time, the pressure to do well, get the marks I needed, make all the choices that would define my future, please my parents, ended up being too much for me and I landed in the hospital.  After all the tests were done, a tumor was ruled out as were a few other scary options. 
Lying in the hospital bed, I made a decision that would alter my life significantly.  I didn’t tell anyone about my decision.  I kept it to myself returning to school going through the motions like all my soon-to-graduate peers were doing. While the excitement about moving from home to start the next chapter of their education was taking shape, my mind was filled with anxiety.

Finally, the time came to choose which university would see me on their campus proudly sporting their sweatshirt.  My parents were quite happy to know that I had received 3 acceptances from 3 well-regarded universities.  My future seemed pretty rosy from their perspective. So, the three of us, my mom, dad and I agreed to set around the table to discuss the options and financial aspects of my next four plus years at university.

Little did they know, that I had much different plans for my life.  I had decided to do a complete 180 degree shift and chart a new path.  That was undoubtedly the hardest thing I have had to do – tell them their dreams of me attending university would not come true, at least not yet.

I can’t even tell you how much courage it took to look them in the eyes and say, “I am not going to university.  I am going to get out and see some of the world first.”  There was complete silence and disappointment on their part.  How could I give up the chances that were laid out for me?  How could I throw away my life like this?  How was I going to support myself was one huge concern of theirs? What does that even mean, see some of the world first?

If telling my parents wasn’t hard enough, explaining my decision to my closest friends and relatives was just as difficult. To say they were appalled at my decision was an understatement.  And then came the questions or assumptions… If you quit your schooling now, you’ll never go back.  You’re giving up an amazing opportunity by not attending university.  Travel the world, why can’t you do that later, after you’ve completed your education?
 
There certainly was pressure to re-think my decision and ‘get back on track’ with my choices.  But, with every opposing opinion and flippant comment about how I was not thinking straight, my resolve to push forward became even stronger.

Fast forward to today…

I don’t regret a thing. 

Before my fellow high school students had graduated their post secondary education, I had seen many European countries, learned a new language, came in contact with so many different cultures – all of which I learned so much from.  It opened my mind and educated my in more ways than traditional schooling can. 
After living in Austria for three years, I actually did attend university and got my degree in Innsbruck. From there, I opened my own learning institution and became a household name in the area I lived and worked.

So, no, I did not follow the path expected by society and my family when I was 18.  I was not complacent and didn’t follow the norms of the time, which dictated getting a post secondary education right out of high school was the way to go.  I challenged these unwritten rules or standards or expectations if you will, I challenged what my parents wanted me to do; I challenged what my best friends thought I should do.
 
My choice not to attend university but rather give myself time and see the world is one of those middle range changes I referred to earlier. 

It was risky, brave, unprecedented (at least in family and circle of friends), very difficult at times, but worth every second. 
It impacted my life significantly.
It increased my self confidence 10-fold.
It showed me how to take risks.
It allowed me to rely solely on myself.
It granted me open-mindedness and understanding toward other cultures.
It paved the way to a very successful and fulfilling career.
It helped me grow and soar to new heights.
It shaped my future in the most amazing way.


I wouldn’t be the person I am today if it wasn’t for the decision I made to go against what society thought my path and destiny should be.

So, I want to challenge YOU to imagine change.  Don’t allow yourself to become complacent with your life as it is currently.

I wish more people would fear complacency rather than being afraid of change.  There are numerous definitions of the term complacency, but I feel this sums it up best:

You are complacent when you have a feeling of calm satisfaction with your own abilities or situation that prevents you from trying harder.  You feel safe, secure without the need to get out of your comfort zone.

Food for thought:  complacency breeds mediocrity and steals potential.  And you know, I am all about helping others achieve greatness.  I am not interested in average, I aim for the stars and I want you to do this too.  Staying within your cosy comfort zone will not allow you to reach your full potential either.  Don’t you want to discover what you are truly capable of?
 
Remember… life begins at the end of your comfort zone.

So, I want you to try new things, set out of your comfort zone and I mean way outside not just baby steps, take risks, do things in ways you’ve never done them before, and become obsessed with the fact that you have but ONE go-round on this planet as the you that is you, and just realize how precious and important it is NOT to squander that.  (modified from original Jen Sincero quote)

I realize the middle changes are the scariest, and they are also by far the most difficult to carry out.

It also takes a lot of courage to imagine change when there’s so much judgement both online and offline.  We have to brush this off, become tone deaf toward this judgement. 

It’s your life and you make the decisions. 

In fact, this is the exact sentence I used as a come-back when friends and family told me I was crazy to turn down the chance of a good university degree.  I boldly and calmly explained, “This is MY life and what I choose to make of it is totally up to me. If I choose to go back to university, then I will but not before I am ready.” 

So, if any of you have gone through one of those middle changes in your life, I salute you from the bottom of my heart.  You have my deepest respect.
You are some of the very few that made the leap before you could even see the safety net.

For those of you who are contemplating a major life change, use my story as motivation and encouragement.  You will grow in so many ways, trust me on this.

The first step is to imagine change, the next step is to take action and pursue it.

So, what do you intend to do with this one precious life you have?


That’s all for today, and thanks for taking time out of your day to tune in.

I will leave you as I always do…
In case you haven’t heard it yet from anyone today, let me be the first to say it…

You are so amazing and capable.  The sky’s the limit and I believe in you wholeheartedly.  Now, go out there and show the world what you are truly made of.

I hope to have inspired you to grow.

Til next time,
Lisa
xoxo
 
 

Taking Charge of Your Belief System

LISTEN TO PODCAST EPISODE HERE -> https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/312Std57twb

In today’s episode of the Inspiration2Grow podcast, we are talking about how we can take charge of our belief system and our minds based on a question I received on social media. 

The question goes like this:

How do you keep your confidence high and know you’re on the right track when you’re not getting the results you want yet?

I love this question for a number of reasons, and I feel a lot of us can relate to this situation.
 
So, let’s jump straight in to a mini-mindset lesson to answer this question.

When you’re not getting the result you want, you need to watch the meaning you create and the story you’re telling yourself about what’s happening.
What is the story you’re creating if you’re not getting the results yet?

For example,  I’m not getting the results, so…

-> This must mean it does not work.
-> This must mean it will NEVER work for me.
-> This must mean the strategy is outdated.
-> This must mean I am not as good at this as I thought I was.

The fact is, you’re telling yourself these very elaborate stories AND choosing really terrible meanings.

You tell yourself a story (oh, I must not be any good at this) and what you believe to be possible shrinks down and your inspiration or motivation to do what you want to do also decreases.  Then you don’t get the result.

Every action you take is influenced by this negative energy.  It also means your potential gets diminished.  You adopt an identity around not being successful due to the lack of results.

You tell yourself, “Oh, this validates what I thought in the first place; it affirms the belief I have.”

Ultimately, you are creating a negative, downward spiral in your mind with these stories. Each non-result or lack of result seemingly underlines what you thought from the beginning, i.e. it will never work for me.

So, what do you do in this situation?

You have to shift the meaning or the story you are telling yourself.

Flip the script with these 2 questions:  What else can you say to yourself about the situation?  What else is true?

With these two closely connected, powerful questions you can reframe how you view the situation and inject new energy into it.

So, what else it true?

* It’s only a matter of time.
* Every time I get better at it.
* It’s not a matter of if, but when.
* I’m going to keep trying until I make it.

AND, the moment you say this to yourself, all of a sudden you feel this surge of energy.  Why?

Because you feel like you are back at cause.  Because you feel like you are back in control.  You are in the driver’s seat instead of the emotions overruling you.  Now, you’re inspired to take action.

You, then, create a new meaning or story.

I want you to say the things that will actually motivate you.  Create the beliefs that are actually going to support you on this journey.

Let me take my beloved example of someone on a fitness journey as an analogy. 

She wants to lose weight, tone her body and gain new strength through her workout routine.  But, it’s hard finding the time each day, hard staying consistent, hard sticking to a calorie-reduced nutrition plan.  It’s just HARD. She starts and stays with it, but isn’t happy with her results or lack thereof.  She questions whether she’s on the right track and whether to throw in the towel.  The bit of confidence she had at the beginning stages of this new routine are waning very quickly.  Is it worth it?  She wants to quit on herself, yet again.

My response to her:

At the beginning of this journey, you were ALL in, fully committed to go on this journey.  You are going to see it through because every time you give up on yourself, you are chipping away at your confidence AND losing integrity momentum (I explained what this is in Episode 13, so check it out).  With every new attempt, you will have to gear yourself up again both emotionally and energetically. So, by all means, keep yourself in the game even if things aren’t progressing, you’re still on the right track.

And, I would ask her…

So, what else it true?

-> It’s only a matter of time.
-> Every time I get better at it.
-> It’s not a matter of if, but when.
-> I’m going to keep trying until I make it.

We humans are meaning-making machines.  We constantly create meaning and stories about what has happened to us and create beliefs that do not serve us.
Every time we have a new experience, we create a meaning/story that is either going to support and serve OR hurt us. 

This is where I say – YOU HAVE A CHOICE.

Flip the script, take control and shift your thoughts for the better! 

I want you to internalize this:

~ I am going to create empowering stories.

~ I am going to redefine the meanings that are actually going to serve me and send/move me in the direction I want to go.

This is what is really, truly going to make the difference.  It’s all about mindset and beliefs.

We must take charge of our belief system and our minds.

Hopefully, this mini-mindset lesson will be useful.  I urge you to listen to it whenever you feel the need, jot down the powerful question as well as the two phrases to remind you of the new, empowering stories you will create in the future.

I will end today’s episode as I always do..

In case you haven’t heard this yet today, let me be the first to tell you…

You are amazing, capable and extraordinary.  I believe in you.  Now, go out and show the world what you are made of.

I hope to have inspired you to grow.

Till next time,

Lisa
xoxo
 

Strengthening Your Integrity in just 5 Minutes a Day

LISTEN TO PODCAST EPISODE HERE -> https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/1b0ld246twb

In my work as a life coach, I help people shift their limiting beliefs through strategic mindset work in order to create transformation in their lives – whatever that means to them.  Some clients desire transformation in the area of their health and fitness, others in their relationships, some in their work situation, while others need to break down their long-held limiting beliefs around money or their new business.  But, in all cases, it all boils down to shifting their beliefs in themselves and their abilities.

Side note:  Yesterday’s episode on Sara Blakely’s mindset shifts and development, that helped her make millions with her company Spanx, are great examples of how a growth mindset makes you unstoppable, tenacious, accepting of failure as a means to learn and grow.  If you haven’t listened to this episode, be sure to check it out.

So, let me just say…

Mindset is 100% of the equation.

Today, I’d like to show you how beginning a new habit for just 5 minutes a day will strengthen your integrity and restore your faith in yourself and your abilities.
As an example, I am going to take working out for just 5 minutes a day to demonstrate how such a short period of time and commitment will restore your integrity and dignity in yourself.

However, if you prefer a 5-minute practice of journalling, meditating, creative writing, even reading, that’s fine and this mini-mindset lesson will work perfectly for any habit you’d like to start and gain some momentum in to create change and transformation in your life.

So, find one small way to show up for yourself each and every day.  It’s something that must be doable, realistic, and attainable.  And remind yourself, if you are doing 1% better today over yesterday, then YOU ARE WINNING. 

Your expectations must be realistic because I’m all about creating REAL habits that create REAL results.

The transformation will happen in both your heart and your head.  We want to generate an internal change about how you feel and love yourself.  Our intentions and actions will impact our hearts, minds, and ultimately our souls.  This will become clearer as we dive deeper into the episode.

You see, creating change from the inside out is essential for any habits to take hold and become part of you. Far too many times, people fall into the traps of not creating internal change first before diving into a new habit on only a surface level.

5 minutes a day is everything.

As humans, we try and fail, try and fail, try and fail to the point where we feel we aren’t worthy or valuable.  We believe that we can’t accomplish anything and begin to hate ourselves.

You might be here right now.  You have quit on yourself far too often giving up after a short period of time labelling yourself as a quitter.  Self-sabotage has become your M.O.

In such cases, we are lacking the most important thing in our lives.  We are not yet aware of the sticky glue that will hold our lives, goals and commitments together.  We don’t yet know the key to success in any area of our lives.

What is the magical ingredient?  INTEGRITY

Integrity is doing what you say you’re going to do when you say you’re going to do it.

You might be one of the millions of people who are struggling with their own integrity.  We are all humans; we all struggle with this.

But the truth is until you figure this out, you will continue to struggle to reach your goals.

You can accomplish anything you put your mind to. You can set your mind to something and do it – even the big things, not just small things.

The problem is quite simple.  If you stopped and asked yourself why you’ve started and failed so many times, you could figure it out.

You’ve spent your life taking on way too much, so many commitments at once in order to create the change you want.

Going back to my example of working out and becoming fitter.  You may have spent hours at the gym, taking all the classes, running or walking, cycling or spinning. You’ve put yourself on a restrictive diet, depriving yourself of a lot.  

You literally want to take on any and all possible commitments so you can get to your goals faster, but that’s just not sustainable.
This is a recipe for disaster and self-sabotage. 

I promise if you continue to take on more than what it sustainable for you, you are bound to fail. 
There is a silver-lining though.  You can do something about it!

So, many clients ask me, “How is 5 minutes actually going to help me, Lisa?”

When you take a leap of faith, you trust me and start small, you’re actually going to start playing a big game.
Instead of committing to everything at once, which we know now is a recipe for disaster -> commit to 5 minutes a day.

What will happen?  You actually start doing what you said you were going to do.  You start having that thing called integrity show up in your life.  And when you have integrity, you build dignity, which is the love you have for yourself.

You actually start to LOVE yourself. How amazing would that be?

Then you start to realize you are good enough and you can accomplish anything.  Once you know this, you say to yourself, “If I can do this,…”  “If I can actually make and keep a promise to myself, what else can I do?”

Then the world becomes your oyster.

This is what I call “Integrity Momentum”.  You may have heard of the Law of Inertia in physics classes.  Well, it tells us that an object in motion, stays in motion.  Whether good or bad, whatever we have going on keeps going on.

So, now that we have integrity going on and dignity going on, we love ourselves and it can keep going.

When you cross something off your to-do list, how does that feel?  I know for me; it feels pretty good.

How does it feel when you complete something you said you were going to do?

These are all wins.  And after a handful of wins under your belt and days of keeping the commitment to yourself, this is a powerful feeling and has massive value for your mind and soul.

You won’t be able to ignore the thoughts running through your head.  We have to shift our thoughts to:
->  I am a promise-keeper.
->  I do what I say I’m going to do.
->  I am the most important person in my world, and I will value & treat myself as such.

This is INTEGRITY.

After you’ve proven to yourself that you’re a promise keeper, you will start setting your sights higher, deservedly because you CAN and SHOULD.
Before you know it, you’re going to be accomplishing things you never ever thought possible AND faster than before.  Much faster than the time when you thought you had to take on the whole world at once.

You see, what I am going to say may seem very counterintuitive but…

You have to slow down to go faster.
 You have to do less to accomplish more.

And it all starts with just 5 minutes.

Remember that it’s all about showing up and making commitments that are ridiculously simple, so ridiculously simple in fact, that you can keep them and show up no matter what the day throws your way.

The goal is to keep yourself winning, each and every day.

In case you haven’t heard it from anyone yet today, let me be the first to tell you…
You are an amazing human being, so full of potential.  I believe in you.  So, now go out and show the world what you are truly made of.

I hope to have inspired you to grow.  

And, til next time.

Lisa
xoxo