Restoring Your Self-Confidence


What does consistency mean to you?
How committed are you to achieving your goals? 
Does anything get in the way of reaching your goals?

I realize that’s a loaded way to start this episode.  Are we talking about consistency in relationships, at work or in your business, with your fitness or nutrition goals?  Of course, there are other areas of our lives in which we could be “consistent” too, like cleaning and de-cluttering, reading, furthering our education, and the list goes on.

Take a moment and ponder how much of a “see-it-through-to-the-bitter-end” kind of person you are.
How many goals have you started but not completed? – I know, this is a tough love Q.

How many times have you made a promise to yourself but gave up when the going got tough? – Be perfectly honest with yourself, now.

Would you categorize yourself as someone who gives up easily? — Not necessarily because the goal was too difficult to reach but perhaps your WHY wasn’t compelling enough to keep the momentum going.  Or, maybe you didn’t enjoy the journey toward the end goal that made you throw in the towel.

Why is it so darned difficult for people to stay consistent in what they want to achieve?  I wish there was an easy answer to this question.

You see, I have struggled with consistency through my own life.  And, only after some very long and deep discovery I have found out what truly held me back from getting over the finish line.

So many times, fear of failure has led me to quit, give up on my dreams, create so much overwhelm that I couldn’t go on, allowed me to believe I couldn’t carry through, helped me to come up with brilliant excuses why I shouldn’t move forward, and ultimately, overruled my will to keep going.

Although this makes me sound like a quitter, I must admit, there have been numerous successful attempts at completing my audacious goals. 

Just recently, I had to set some new health goals based on advice from my doctors.  Lose weight, move your body, eat anti-inflammatory foods and avoid the ‘bad stuff’, which came as no surprise at all.  These are things I have been trying to implement for years now.  However, this message hit home on a much different level due to my current health situation and increasing lack of mobility.

So, I had to prepare myself for a ‘no failure option’ and my commitment and dedication toward achieving these daily goals had to be extremely solid, rock solid in fact.

And, after starting approx. 10 months ago, I am happy to write that I have been able to move the needle on my success pendulum. 
Here are some takeaways that I hope will be helpful to you in setting your goals and loving the journey to success:

·         Start by setting the tiniest of goals each day.  Because I was desperately afraid of failing to see my plan through, I had to set the smallest goals for myself.  That meant being satisfied with only 15 minutes of walking as opposed to my larger goals of 5 kilometers.  Once my body and mind were comfortable with these new habits, I was then able to extend the duration.  In doing so, I created positive momentum within myself.  All the while, I had to remind myself that even tiny steps in the right direction will help me create the continuity and habit-forming behaviour that I needed to instill in my mind.

·         Set yourself up for success the night before If you don’t plan and schedule the night before, things won’t go as intended the following day.  I have been in this situation lots of times.  Lofty intentions and plans the night before, but I didn’t take the time to write down the tasks, put out the workout clothes, prepare the food I needed to stay on track with my eating plan.  There is so much truth in the saying, “Failing to plan, is planning to fail.”  You really need to take a few minutes – the night before – to organize your thoughts, jot down on paper what you want to achieve the next day, put out any equipment or clothing you will require, prep your meals.  Just taking these actions will put you in a much better mindset to step into and crush the next day. 
·         Use a quote or a self-written promise to keep you motivated. A trick that really helped me this time was to write down a quote that I found particularly inspiring.  After a few days of doing this, I began creating my own mantras or sentences to motivate myself.  These cue cards were placed front and center on my desk next to my computer and I constantly glanced at them during the day.  I also listed three actions that I really wanted to take on that day including check boxes beside each to check off once completed.  You can’t forget or ignore your daily goals if they are staring at you each day.  I had never done anything like this before and I swear this really helped me gain the momentum I needed this time.
·         Celebrate each day’s win(s).  Once the day is drawing to an end, revisit what you have accomplished and be sure to celebrate it.  Go to a mirror, smile at yourself, tap yourself on the back and simply say, “I love you for sticking to your goals today.  You are amazing!”  Of course, you might have another self-love statement that you typically use.  It’s important to be proud and pleased of your small steps towards your goals.  I have learned that loving the journey to the finish line is far more important than concentrating on the end goal.  Take it from someone who has been a constant quitter!
·         Repeat your daily incremental goals to yourself constantly throughout the day.  Our days can become hectic very quickly.  We can get distracted by many different things:  work, family, world events, friends, social media, you name it – our ego thrives on distraction, but hates focus.  Have you ever heard the saying, “Where focus goes, energy flows”?  Well, if you repeatedly focus on your daily goals and revisit them (written on a cue card), your energy will be more easily directed toward achieving them.  Don’t allow yourself to let daily life distract you from your planned course of action.
·         Establish a winning morning routine.  Many successful people claim to be early risers and get a jump start on their days with various forms of a ‘winning morning routine’.  Some like movement, mediation, reading, journaling, etc. to get off to a great start.  I do believe that establishing a winning morning routine holds some magic and offers immense benefits especially if you can crush one of your tiny daily goals and set yourself up for an amazing, positive start to your day.  Although it isn’t the easiest of new habits to implement, the saying, “win the morning, win your day” holds a lot of merit.
·         Remove yourself when the going gets tough.  You will encounter moments during the day when temptation to deviate from the plan seems easier or more pleasurable then actually staying the course.  You will have to remove yourself until your mind can get back on track again.  It might require you to re-read your daily goals, go for a walk, read a book, etc.  When my husband is making a delicious snack in the evening which is not aligned with my daily nutrition goals, I must get as far away as possible from the kitchen in order to maintain my willpower.  It this case my mind would provide me with tons of reasons why I should fall back on my old habits, which would be to join him in creating a yummy snack. Our mind has these neuropathways which are established over time, and we tend to take the path of least resistance, the default pathway the one that is well-known to us rather than create a brand-new pathway with our new habits. 
·         Track your small daily wins as progress. Keeping track of your daily progress needn’t be fussy or fancy, yet it is essential.  It is proof that you ARE moving forward, that you ARE staying true to yourself, that you ARE keeping your daily promises to yourself.  Even a Post-It note placed somewhere strategic can be enough to show you that you have indeed accomplished your daily quota on commitment to yourself.
·         Give yourself some grace. Not every day is going to go as planned.  That’s life and we can’t knock yourselves down for that.  It is important to know that our minds and bodies require a little bit of forgiveness now and again.  If you start to listen closely to what your body is telling you and how you feel, that will help you determine when you need to just “be you” without a grand plan to follow.  I really think it is crucial to give yourself a day off from a routine and simple do things that light you up.  Plan to get back on track the next day though.  Letting yourself deviate from your plan to achieve your goals for too many days will only make it much more difficult to resume your daily schedule of crushing your goals. 
·         Recommit to the promises you make to yourself each morning.  If you follow my advice (which I hope you do by the way because it has taken many years of experience to develop 😊), you will get set up for the next day’s success the night before.  This means jumping out of bed the following day with a plan in place to tackle the day.  As mentioned above, there are many situations presented to us every single day that can easily derail and distract us from following our plan.  Therefore, recommitting and revisiting the daily plan multiple times during your day is absolutely essential. 
Stay the course, remain committed to your daily greatness, track & celebrate your progress, have a plan in place for those tough moments, prep the night before, be proud of yourself and express it with some self-love talk, but most of all – be true to you and keep the daily promises to yourself.  Because at the end of the day, the only person you are accountable to is…yourself!

I believe in you wholeheartedly. Now, go out there and show the world what you are truly made of!

With love,